MATCHING SLOGAN TEES FOR WOMEN'S DAY : STYLE FILES

 Happy Women's Day to all of you! I had a wonderful day of working from home and enjoying some special moments with my daughter. When you have been working from home, for almost a year, your outfit choices can get into a rut. But I have seen that when I make the effort to get dressed for the day, rather than hide myself in pajamas, I feel so much more positive! So decided to do a matching outfit with my mini-me! 

When I saw these slogan tees at GAP, I knew we had to get them. They were not only perfect for Women's Day or Women's History Month, but they were perfect for me and my daughter, all year round! My t-shirt reads " Empowered Women Empower Women!" And my daughter's matching t-shirt reads," Empowered Girls Empower Girls!" Mine is pale pink, while my daughter's t-shirt is more of bubble-gum pink. Am so glad I chanced upon these! 

We both paired our t-shirts with jeans! While Rii opted for navy blue skinny jeans by GAP, mine was my Jogger Denim by Express. Regarding the fit of the t-shirt, I found mine to be quite snug. Usually, if  I pick up a Medium size in most t-shirts, they are not snug. Maybe next time, if I want a looser fit from a gap t-shirt, I will opt for an L. We wore our outfits to our Zoom classes/work meetings, and enjoyed eating lunch together! I shall be back in my building, after a year,so I made sure that today was extra special. 

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RIONA DOES MOMMY'S MAKE UP

Its no mystery as to how much of a Make Up Buff I am. I love Make up, I dream about make up, I write about make up. I am mostly a self taught make up artists and have learnt so much from this whom I have watched in close quitters, Yes, I come from a  film family in India, with both my grandmas being popular and important in the Bollywood and Tollywood circuits respectively. I have grown up seen the power of the Red Lipstick on these lovely ladies. Then there is my Mom. The perfect Diva if there ever is. Her ma dup is always on point and she would not even step put for gravers without a touch of her favorite lipsticks.

So another generation takes this love forward, it needs to be documented right. Here's my lovely daughter Riona, doing my make up, when I had tried to sneak in a nap. Her touch was a blessing to my fever ridden brain and it was such a joy to see her tiny fingers working up a magic. Here's a sneak peak from what I could capture with my cell phone.

Enjoy !!!

  Ω

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BEING A MOTHER

Recently my friend Bhawna, who blogs under Yellow Mellow Life, asked me to share my thoughts on the challenges of Motherhood,for a post she was compiling. In my crazy weekend schedule, I manged to scribble in my honest thoughts, while trying not to provide an ideal answer. As I went through her post,and read about a few other Mothers and their journeys, I knew a post on my own Blog was surely due.

I am a Mother to a beautiful toddler girl Riona, who is my rainbow baby. I had missed being a mother years back. And that scarring was too deep for me for quite a few years. Then came the brilliant journey of pregnancy for the second time, and we had our Queen with us.

Bhawna's post got me thinking on all that I have learnt along the way being a Mom or what exactly were my memories with my Mom.

As a student in school, I remember how we would all draw up our Mother's Day cards in our Crafts Class a week before Mother's Day. I still remember what I had drawn one particular year. A simple hand made card and a big Hug for my Mom. Its fresh in my memory how happy she used to be very year. And now I get to see my Mother every few years,given that we stay in two different countries. So Mother's Day usually means an extra long phone call, or even a Skype Session if internet networks don't get jammed on that Sunday. Last year we were beyond lucky as three generations got to celebrate Mother's Day together. And did I mention we even color co-ordinated our outfits without so much as consulting each other. Great ladies think alike, I guess. Its this memory which I shall hold on to be the best Mother's Day memory for me,so far. Not often will three generations get to celebrate such special days together.

My Mother is my idol.I have learnt all my life and continue to learn every day from her. Even a simple phone call from her, can make my day wonderful, even if we are stuck in two feet of snow for the Nth day here in the cold Midwest US. She is my biggest Diva and she will always remain so. She is a lady who has perfectly balanced her career and family life with perfect elan. She has always made sure that we had our weekend outings as a family. we never missed any fair, or any circus which was visiting town. And she dressed us up in the most stylish of outfits. A few days after she had given birth to my younger brother, she was out with my Dad, picking up new outfits to wear for the upcoming Bengali New Year. Now I know how diffilcult it is to even stand on yor own feet after giving birth, leave alone go out in the hot summer in sultry Kolkata to shop. But trust my Mom to do it all in her signature style with a big smile on her face. My Mom always smiles,and thats something I try to imbibe every day. A smile can win a thousand battles and it makes you stronger.

So when it came to my own journey of being a Mother, I have learnt every step of the way from her. She could not be physically present when I delivered my daughter, but she was there with me in spirit all the time. She taught me always to be tough and suck it up and face all that life threw my way. So when I had to pull my PJs exactly 48 hours after pushing out a baby, I remembered her words that I could do it. I had been in labor for 18 hours, pushed my baby out, had third degree tears, and it was snowing heavily. My daughter had high bilirubin levels so had to be taken back to the Hospital for a simple blood test. But a simple act of pulling your pants up can be so difficult when you have trouble standing up. Not to forget you have to walk through snow to get to your car.

As I mentioned in the post in Bhawna's Blog that you can read all you want on what Motherhood is, but you can never be fully prepared.

For years I have had many critics tell me that I suffer from the incurable urge to be a winner at every step of life. Yes, I completely agree to that. I like to win. Even with my Motherhood, I wanted to win every challenge that came my way. But to be honest, I may have managed to fare not so greatly at some of the challenges that Motherhood brought for me, and super succeeded at others. So its been a great balance. I have learnt to take things in my stride and go with the flow. That's whats helped me out all these 2 years of Motherhood plus the none months of successful pregnancy.

So while I had milk soaked Nursing Bras, I dabbed on some bright red lipstick and loads of mascara, and shook a leg at party with my baby in my arms. My mom used to dance with me and my brother,when we were younger. That was one of my favorite dances ever. She used to hold us in her arms, do a Waltz with us. Did I mention that she is a trained Ball Room dancer and I have never been able to match a step with her when she hits the dance floor. So the simple fact that I could dance with my baby in arms in exactly the same way, as my mom had danced with me and my brother, are the memories I cherish. We carried on the tradition of dancing with my Mom, even on the morning of my wedding. And we hope to continue the tradition of dancing together among every other fun thing we do together.

Happy Mother's Day MAAA !! Love you !!!

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HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY BROTHER: MY LIFELINE !!!

Everyone has one person in their life,who is their lifeline. Their source of sustenance. Someone who can complete their unfinished sentences. Someone who will always stand by their side, no matter which walk of life they are in. Someone who loves them unconditionally.For me that is my brother. Riddhiman.

He is that jewel which any and every sister should have in their life.

For thsoe who ahvent met him, he is a man of many talents. He is an Avid Biker and is a prominent part of the Biking community of India. He is a an awesome Animal activist. He has rescued innumerable abandoned and injured animals all across and continues to do so. He has never shied from standing up for what is right,without caring for the consequences. He is working hard in building a new SHELTER for Abandoned Animals in Kolkata.

 
Coming back to his birthday. Yes, I was due on my brother's birthday. Riona and her Mamuji would have shared birthdays,except for a few hours here and there. Riona came a few hours earlier and she and her Mamuji shared two different birthdays. Two days of back to back celebrations for our family for sure. I was at the hospital recuperating from a normal delivery with third degree lacerations, but I had made sure that my brother's birthday cake had been shipped to him,continents apart, right on time.

For the age gap, we have between us, I have always been Motherly towards him. And also been guilty of being overt;y bossy as well.

 I still remember the first time I had heard of his arrival. We had been expecting my sibling for the whole 40 weeks. Mom had been taken to the hospital and the next morning,as I was sleepily brushing my teeth, my Dad had rushed home to inform me, that I had a brother. All the sleep vanished from my eyes,and I wanted to run and see him. It was a Bharat Bandh on that day, or an All India Shutdown of sorts. Those were the days when strikes were more common than anything else, in the Indian political psyche.  The streets were completely empty. No vehicles were in sight. we made our way to the hospital. Me,my Dad and my Koiya(my Nanny). My mother was still drowsy from her Epidural as I saw her. But she managed to smile despite all her pain and tiredness.

And there he was. Our biggest bundle of joy had arrived. Riddhiman was earthside. He was in his small cot  staring at us with his big eyes. No,he wasn't crying at all. He was a very Happy Baby. You could not miss his head full of jet black hair. Full of ringlets. If there was perfection on earth, it was embodied in him.

My partner in crime for life had arrived. I used to rush home from the bus stop after I got off from the school bus, to catch the first glimpse of him at home. There he was. Sleeping in his swing in the warm Indian Summer afternoons.

How time flies. Seems like just yesterday.

He was always the outdoorsy kind, making up for my lack of being active and all about town, as a kid. We always had so much to share with each other,despite our apparent age gap.  We have always consulted each other on anything and everything,including what to wear for parties. It's always each others opinion or advice which has mattered to us.

 
He is a person, who is quite an extrovert for the apparent eye. But to know what is within his heart needs some effort. He will never reveal to you even when he is in deep pain, but will work extra hard to even remove the traces of your slightest discomfort. He will go all out to help any and everyone in need. May be that is the reason so many people try to take advantage of his goodness. He is one of those rare good people around. If there were more people like him, around the globe, the world would be a better place, for the sheer amount t of warmth he exudes even in daily life.

He manages to touch the hearts of everyone whom he comes across effortlessly. His smile is enough to make any heart melt.

Its another Birthday of his that I am far away from him. My heart wishes for his well being above everything else. May he be as special as he is. Love you Tumzee. Miss you. Always proud of you.

Our sibling love is what the legends are made of, I feel. I have so often heard from so many siblings complaining, as to why don't they have as much bonding as much as Bhai and Me do. I have overheard these conversations and sent a silent prayer to the Almighty for such a perfect bond. I could never have asked for more.

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MY CHILD BIRTH STORY : BIRTH WITHOUT FEAR

I had been planning to pen down my Birth Story for quite some time. I had always been inspired by the blog"BIRTH WITHOUT FEAR," to write of my own experiences. My Daughter's 2nd Birthday is finally here, so it was the perfect opportunity. Two whole years to that day,which is surely my happiest day till date.

The day I held my rainbow baby in my hand. The culmination of a successful pregnancy,after not so successful one. If you are wondering how did the nine months roll by for me, I penned down MY PREGNANCY JOURNEY STORY. Trying to culminate nine eventful months, in a single post, was quite tedious.

Coming down to how the final act went off. Let me warn you,this post contains graphic details.Giving birth is no cake walk. 

I had been for my final Ultrasound Scan when my Maternal Fetal Specialist Dr. Elizabeth Wickstorm. I was at 39 weeks and I had not started to dilate. She informed me that although I had not dilated, Baby had dropped down into position. So it was best that I get Induced for labor.That cuts down the Baby's chances of going into distress. Delaying and waiting for another two weeks, could risk the chances of Still Birth. Now that is very scary for a Mom who has already lost an unborn child.

I met my OBGYN Dr. Phaedra Lombard right after this appointment. I was clearly disturbed,but I was not ready to opt for a C-Section. I wanted a Natural Birth by all means. I had heard how much my mother has suffered from two C-Sections. We discussed all about Inducing Labor. We had learnt in our Child Birth Classes that Induction can sometimes lead to slow labor and might also lead to C-Section. I was scared of C-Sections. My OBGYN(read: A perfect Angel) kept assuring me we would be trying for a natural birth as long as the child did not go into distress. 

She also told me,that a lot depended on me. If I believed in myself, that I could go through a natural birth, then I would be able to do it. I can never forget those inspiring words. They are so true. 

We were already pre-registered at the Hospital which had an updated and brand new Maternity Wing.  By the time, I was in my hospital gown and ready for the first stage of induction, it was 7pm on March 13th 2013. After the initial Blood work, and the customary IV drips, the First Phase of Induction took place. The Cervidil was administered. It tries to cheat the Cervix into thinning out and starting dilate. I kept praying. My OB nurse for the night told me that I should try and have a light dinner,as the next day I would be without food or water.

So a sandwich and some pop was my last dinner before I met my Queen. 

She also gave me a light sedative as she said, I needed to conserve my energy for the next day. 

But before the sedative could kick in, something else happened. It was around midnight when the crazy contractions started. Active  Labor had begun,without the second phase of Induction at all. My prayers had been answered at this stage. Daddy was fast asleep on his couch in my Labor and delivery Room,while I battled the craziest of contractions. I managed to buzz for my OB nurse. She sat by my bedside, woke up Daddy. 

I wanted to delay the Epidural as much as I could. 

My water broke at around 6 am on March 14th 2013. And whats when the real countdown started. As then the Baby is without the protection of the amniotic fluid. My OBGYN met me shortly later and checked for my dilation. I was only dilated to 3 cm. We decided to go ahead with the second phase of Induction. Yes, the much dreaded Pitocin.Or as they say in medical jargon, I was about to get Pitted. I had heard horror stories of one of my best friends in India., who had been Pitted and had to be rushed to C-Section. I was almost fighting with my mind, I had to Push my baby Out. 

It was around 10 am, when my OBGYN came to meet me again. She informed me that my Platelet count was decreasing progressively. If I had any hopes for an Epidural, I should take it now. Or else they would not be able to administer it later. Getting an Epidural only means, that you get confined to bed,and it slows down labor. All my hopes for a tub birth went to the ground. I decided to go for it. I needed to conserve my energy and epidural would help. 

After the Epidural was administered, the nurse assured me that I would not be able to feel the contractions. The problem with an induced labor is that, the contractions are really rough and intense. But then, why was I feeling everything and writhing in pain. We called for the Anesthesiologist yet again. Was I a smoker before I got pregnant? That was the question tossed to me, in a  room full of nurses . Yes, I was. No Wonder. If you have been a Smoker, then your body needs a higher dosage. So  we went ahead with a much higher dosage. There was also a switch which you could press , every 15 minutes, which sent an extra shot of pain killer up the system. My OB nurse told me to make full use of that. 

Pretty soon, I was all numb from waist down. The Nurse at my bedside kept a track of my contractions from the NST monitors on my belly. Me and Daddy decided to make goo duse of the swank hospital room and all the movies on order. We decided to watch a movie. Did I mention that Daddy had tucked in his lunch heartily while I was struggling with just ice chips. Super mean !! 

My dilation was somehow not increasing,my nurses kept telling,as they kept checking on me very now and then. I was still stuck at 3 cm. 

That's when the brainwave happened. I remembered from my Child Birth Class, that in such cases,  a PEANUT BALL tucked between the two legs can increase the dilation and speed up labor. I asked my Nurse for it and she was more than happy to get it for me. She mentioned that as a policy Hospitals cannot offer such Birthing Aids,but they are always there, if the patient asks of them. Bingo. I sent a silent Thank You for my ChildBirth Educator Nurse Tiffany Kinneman. 

We had some visitors at around 5 pm. Daddy's colleagues who had dropped in from work. We told them that probably Baby would arrive the next day. Daddy decided to see them off to the parking lot,when my OB Nurse decided to check on my dilation. She was all smiles. I had dilated to 10 cm and was 100% Effaced(thinned out). 

"We are ready to PUSH!" She casually mentioned,as she paged my OBGYN and the rest of the labor staff. 

"Can you please look for my Husband!!!!" was my urgent plea. 

Daddy walked in to a room full of OB Nurses. 

We were ready to Push. I had attended Child Birth Classes and practices Breathing Techniques,but your mind does go blank. Dr. Lombard kept reminding me on how to push and how to breathe through the contractions. As I was on Epidural, I could not even feel when a Contraction was happening. The nurses kept looking into the monitor and shouting PUSH when the time came. 

We tried for around 15 minutes. 

Dr. Lombard kept inspiring me. 

"Stay with me. You can do it" "You will do it" these were the words reaching me from all quarters. I knew I could not give up on this baby at this hour. I could push her out. 

Dr. Lombard tried a change in technique. She asked for a bed sheet and had me pull at one end and she held on to another. 

Baby had started to Crown by this time. 

"I can see her !" Daddy shouted

We deiced to take a break to conserve some energy. 

Daddy offered me some Ice chips as my lips were parched. The ice chips made me want to throw up,and I felt an URGE TO PUSH. And she was OUT. 

Wooohooooooooooo !!!!!!! I had done it. 

Dr. Lombard handed over the surgical shears to Daddy to CUT THE CHORD. He did his part.

6 lb 2 oz of Sheer Goodness. Perfect APGAR score of 9.99 . We did Good. 

We were officially PARENTS  to our squealing bundle of joy. Tt was time for SkIn to Skin with my Baby. Words are never enough the describe the feeling when I first held her in my arms. It was the answer to all my prayers. She was perfect in every way and surely had the lung power of her mother. Her Father's big black eyes for sure. The nurses agreed on this. 

"Do you have a camera?" asked one of the OB nurses. "I have two cameras." mentioned a confused first time Daddy which even had me laughing at that moment. Click click click went the first set of pictures of our newborn, who got her first bath shortly. 

Being petite and delivering my child naturally, I had THIRD DEGREE LACERATIONS which had to be sutured by Dr. Lombard. And that's when she told me that she had delayed her family vacation as she had promised me she would stay by me. Could I have asked for anything more in a OBGYN

It was time to Nurse and RIONA latched on just perfectly. Things could not go any better for me. I kept Thanking the almighty. 

I was changed in to a fresh gown and transferred to a recovery room,which was my home for the next day as well. Then came the part that no one warns you about. You begin the worst kind of Rigors. You begin to shiver continuously. That's one of the way the body copes with Child Birth. Crazy for sure.

We had loads of visitors for Baby RIONA the next day and even an official photo shoot. I was due around St. Patricks day so we settled for an Irish Name. Riona means QUEEN IN GAELIC. 

I was due on March 15th 2013 and Riona arrived just a a few hours earlier on 8;15 pm on March 14th 2013.  Could not have asked for a more perfect Labor Story !!! Riona would have shared her birthday with my brother Riddhiman,but she just came a few hours earlier. So we have two days of back to back celebrations in our family. 

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MY PREGNANCY JOURNEY

Just can't believe how fast time flew and we are getting close to the most special time of the year for us. Our daughter is all set to roll into her second birthday. Seems like yesterday, that we came to know we were about to be parents. The Baby Book needs some updating for sure.

But there are things,which the pages of the Baby Book cannot contain. That is the journey of my Pregnancy. The pregnancy with my Rainbow Baby Riona. So this countdown to her birthday gave me the perfect opportunity to pen it all down. What if age takes a toll, and some finer details skip from my memory.

So here's how it all began.

Having had a not so successful first Pregnancy right after we got married, it took me several years to come to terms, that I wanted to be pregnant again. You cannot stop blaming yourself for all the wrong that went on. You have your scars.

We had decided that we would start Baby Planning in 2012. We had done the customary OBGYN consultation as I suffer from both Thyroid and PCOS. And I was over 30

It took a trip to the Great Smoky Mountains, to have go the Baby Way.

Unawares that Baby was already on the way, we went head on a trip to the East Coast.

It was a dizzy spell on the treadmill at our gym, which made me take a Pregnancy Test. And another. And another. You need to be sure.

We joined in on the Pregnancy Bandwagon full on.

The bump made a debut on a  local red carpet. It was Fashion's Night Out and KC was celebrating it. So we made it there and got clicked. It was my friend Archana who as the first to notice and we were happier than ever to acknowledge.

The First Trimester came with its share of Morning Sickness in a ll its Ugly avatar. I was throwing up more than I could even take in. I survived on some Ghee-Bhaat and Bread Butter. Lime, Lemon and citrus scents were a savior.

But it was over soon enough and on came the second trimester. It was also Daddy To be Birthday. So we planned to go ahead to New England again. This time our agenda was Fall Colors. We also packing in a trip to Ben and Jerry's Ice Cream Factory in Vermont. No wonder the lil one loves her ice cream so much.

It had started off as a No Risk Pregnancy and we wanted to keep it that way,if we could.

My OBGYN had asked me to continue pre-pregnancy work out schedule and I was happy to do that. She had mentioned that it would help build my stamina for labor. She was so right.

I did get the occasional odd stare at the Gym with the growing Bump,but the majority were great wishes from everyone else working out. Which also led to some locker room selfies

The OBGYN visits were going off exceptionally well. We used to wait with bated breath to hear the heartbeat of our growing baby. It was almost like a Horse running by. The swift heartbeats of our baby. So near yet so far away.

Lo and Behold it was time for Durga Puja. Being away from India, means that you celebrate the Indian Festivals over a  convenient weekend. So we were all set to celebrate Durga Puja from Friday to Sunday. I had a OBGYN visit on that particular Thursday. It was the date of our Gender Reveal Ultrasound Scan. Yes, we were having a girl. Secretly, I had been wishing for a girl. I had been keeping my fingers crossed all through the ride to the hospital. So it was almost like, Maa Durga was coming home with us. The Pujo became extra special. I even shook a leg to the desi beats.

Soon it time time to Celebrate another year of togetherness. The Anniversary came beckoning. So we got dressed and partied hard. A fancy French dinner at one of KC's best: Le Fou Frog

The second trimester is the only time when you can color your hair. I was clearly not elating that opportunity go. Got a fresh dose of color,as I knew it would be quite some time, before i could get touch ups done. Opted for my signature warm honey blonde highlights.

Soon it was time for the Holidays. So we attended a warm and cosy Holiday party with our extended family in town.

Then we packed our bags for a Baby Moon of sorts. We were going down south.

We paid our respects to the King. Graceland was the first stop.

Then we headed off to the Sea. Gulf Shores and Pensacola.

In all these adventures, the second trimester rolled on to the Third. being pregnant over 30 also means, you enter the High Risk stage of Pregnancy at this time. So started the bi weekly Non Stress Tests, to ensure that Baby was doing alright. Nerve crunching times for sure, which we ushered in with load of prayers.

Also squeezed in our Child Birth and New Born care Classes. They did make daddy wear the Emphatic Belly weighing 30 pounds to make him feel what Pregnancy feels like in a  nutshell.

Then came the Time for my Baby Showers First up was the Desi baby Shower or Shaadh hosted by my Mashi here in KC.

The second Baby Shower was hosted by some of my Husband's colleagues. They Took us out for a Fondue Dinner. Fancy Shmancy !!!

The NSTs carried on and before we realized we were at the home stretch. Baby was full term. How did it all go from there? Time for another post for sure.

Not to forget we also had our share of a proper maternity Photo Shoot. our good friend Arka,who had also planned the Baby Shower, took some great pictures for us, to cherish for a lifetime. I managed to pack in all that I wanted to pack in my pregnancy, in proper grace.

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